Chad Et Moi

My friend Chad is one of the nicest guys you'll ever meet which presents a stark contrast whenever we're together, so it's probably fortunate for me that we've never been together.

Anyway, I started beefing up my Google homepage which isn't actually my homepage, it's more of a vacation homepage, and one of the modules I added was Facebook because I was prodded into opening a Facebook account by another friend who shall remain nameless because Facebook hasn't done a thing for me except expose me to stand, Kathryn, and a former girlfriend who apparently still hates me – decades later. Meanwhile, Stan doesn't return my messages and I had to drop Kathryn because she doesn't hate Obama, and because she writes stupid stuff that only housewives want to read – actually a subset of housewives, those who were adopted… presumably as children.

Whew!

So Chad said something about something yesterday, and I felt compelled to jump in. Does it really matter what? As you'll see, not to me!

OK, OK, Chad said something about Facebook changing his password against his will and then sending him a new one that he apparently found offensive… the ingrate.

Ted: Your Facebook email is maybe their way of offering you a preview of Bobocare!?

Chad: Don't get me started on politics, Ted. I'm having a good day:)

Ted: Really? What's that like?

Chad: In my never to be humble opinion, it's always a better day when you don't talk about politics. Unfortunately, I've had to temporarily come out of retirement to rant and rave about such things. Basically, I'm gearing up for the midterm elections. After that, I'm going back into my cave to hibernate for a few more months.

Ted: I'd like to say something constructive here, but as you know, that's not my style. So happy hibernating?

Ted: Oh, I have something that might cheer you. I just heard on the local news that it's bee season here, so we have to be alert and aware. You know, because bees have the right of way.

And what you don't know until this very moment is that I misspelled "hibernating" in my original message to Chad… because I'm so used to cybernating….

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About tedwest

A longtime veteran of comedy and political forums, I decided that I needed a more restful venue because... well... I finally hate everybody. Except my wife that is... and my ex-wife.. and... no, that's about it. I lead about as simple a life as one can, preferring activities that include anything that doesn't involve going out and seeing YOU! And I particularly enjoy what I call "Get the Bitch" movies on Lifetime. You know the ones where the intended victim finally does something so incredibly stupid that she forfeits her right to live, and from that moment on you're rooting for the stalker. Of course, it rarely works out the way you want, but when it does, the feeling you get is... well, there's nothing else like it, other than, maybe, eating chocolate chip cookies. Oh, and I'm proudly anti-wildlife, both foreign and domestic, and anti-environment - especially foreign environments. I think Howard Stern put it best when he said, "If fifty percent of the population died tomorrow, I can live with that." And I feel the same about the other fifty percent, so together, we've pretty much got it all covered.
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7 Responses to Chad Et Moi

  1. Darcy says:

    LOL– I love Chad's never humble opinion and I wish I had a cave I could hibernate in, but alas, I have to deal with the public.

  2. TedWest says:

    It's the one sliver that makes life tolerable for me – that I don't have to deal with the public – or even see them unless I choose to. And right now I'm avoiding the neighbors at all cost as I fear one might ask what I think of Obama – and my best neighbor friend is black.

  3. Darcy says:

    You might find that he does not approve of Obo either.

  4. TedWest says:

    Let me put it this way… when I first moved here, Mike showed me a copy of Rush Limbaugh's book that he had bought, and I said that I wouldn't have expected him to be reading that. His reply? "Know your enemy."

  5. Darcy says:

    All I'm saying is that you might be surprised.

  6. TedWest says:

    I know what you're saying, but my fear is that I'll surprise him. He's a very nice guy. He's like a black Chad. But if he likes Obama… it will destroy us.

  7. Darcy says:

    OK, stay hidden for the next 3 years.

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