Just for fun, I decided to rank the talking heads according to how long it takes me to start screaming when I first seem them on my screen. The list is not comprehensive. For example, it excludes the ones I'd prefer to see die a slow and horrible death since I don't watch them – Olberman, Matthews, Alec Baldwin…
OK, I agree that Baldwin isn't exactly a talking head, but here's how bad it is – I wanna see Steve Martin die a horrible death just for appearing on stage with Baldwin at the upcoming Oscar ceremonies.
The list then is in ascending order meaning that those I'm inclined to dislike are at the top, and those who are so rotten that their original form is unrecognizable are at the bottom
And in a class by himself…
In the interest of space, the list, of course, is not to scale. If it were, there would be a very long space between Brown and O'Reilly – who would actually still be off it. And what caught my attention afterward is that there's only one conservative on the list. He's there really because he's just too stupid for any sentient being to listen to for more than a few moments and not lose IQ points.
On the bright side, there are five heads I like, and the best is also at the bottom of this list…
And standing on Rush's shoulders…
Of course, when it comes to the written word, James Taranto stands alone. The only problem is that I'm not sure how much of his column is actually him since the column is a collaborative effort.
As I was writing this, I happened to catch a clip of Glenn Beck's "speech" at CPAC. The quotes are because it wasn't so much a speech as a performance, and it made me think he should probably be a lot further down on the bad list.
*This is a projection, it's not how I actually feel about him at this time. It's based on his decision to back the "jobs" bill which, I believe, is an early indicator of more egregious positions in the offing. So if I were to rank him today based solely on his actions so far, I'd place him just above John McCain.
**I don't actually listen to Savage at all, but every time I hear or read something he's said, I usually find myself a huddled mass yearning to breathe free..