Conservatives Are Sharks, But Don’t Worry

Maybe you'll listen to Joe Farah? Because I'm tired of gettin' nowhere.

I've said that if there's any group I hate more than Democrats, it's Republicans. If there's any group I hate more than liberals, it's conservatives. I've called conservatives weak, and I've said that they are not willing to act to save anything. They're always looking to the next guy to take up the cause. 

As if to prove my point, Jim Malberg wrote a piece on BloggersBase recently in which he decried the fact that both his daughter and his niece have encountered liberal professors at different schools who have chastised the women for their conservative beliefs, and perhaps even mocked them and encouraged others to scorn them.

So what did Jim do? Well, he expressed proper indignance at what his family members had experienced and then… he called for… nothing. That's right, he called for something that amounted to NOTHING! 

So I suggested that he might have had a better story if he told us how his daughter stood up to the creep and told him to stuff it. Oh no, says Jim, he's daughter wants to be a lawyer and she doesn't need her student "career" jeopardized by some unilateral and futile act.

I told him that he sounded just like our Founding Fathers might have. I forgot to add the NOT!

So here's what Farah has to say today:

The conservative mantra about the Republican drubbing in the midterm congressional elections is: "Conservatives didn't lose, Republicans did."

With all due respect to my conservative friends, this is the kind of thinking that will take them the way of the Whigs.

Don't get me wrong. I love conservatives. Some of my best friends are conservatives. But being "conservative" is not a bold vision for the future. Being "conservative" will never inspire Americans to reject socialism and immorality. Banking on this word, this wholly inadequate, timid ideology is, instead, a sure-fire recipe for political defeat for the foreseeable future.

That's a pretty good start. What else does Joe have to say you ask?

There are three fundamental problems with conservatism:

  • It is a defensive movement rather than offensive;
  • Its exclusive field of battle is electoral politics;
  • It lacks the vision of a better future

Take the gay marriage issue. No rational person would accept such a preposterous idea. Two people should be able to make a contract to cover particular needs, but marriage? between two men? There's a term for that - sick!


You would think that amendments simply declaring marriage to be an institution between one man and one woman would garner at least 90 percent support among Americans. Yet, even in four states in which the amendment passed, opposition exceeded an astounding 40 percent of the vote.

Conservatives look at those numbers and see victory. I've got news for you: So do the same-sex marriage activists. I look at those numbers and see inevitable defeat. It might be in 2008 or 2010 or 2012. But the die is cast. There is no question that the American view of marriage is changing.

Conservatives simply can't sit back and expect to settle issues rationally in the voting booth. I saw on Drudge yesterday that some "tea party" had a big turnout in Florida. it turned out to be 3000 people. America is rapidly disintegrating before our eyes and 3000 people is gonna more a liberal politician is gonna change course?

Farah puts it this way…

Imagine American politics as a tug of war. One side in the battle is actually playing to win – to pull its opponents into the moat. The other side, though, is simply trying not to get pulled into the moat

Like it or not, the very nature of the word "conservative" defines the ideology. It is not a radical movement to expand freedom and economic opportunity. It is not a radical movement to restore justice and morality. It is not a radical movement to achieve victory over evil. Instead, it is a "conservative," defensive movement that is merely content standing still.

And Woody Allen likens that to a shark – it has to keep moving forward or it dies. "And what we have here," he says, "Is a dead shark."

Now Farah says his is a two-part column, so I'm anxious to read his prescription for victory tomorrow, because it if doesn't involve jeopardizing "careers" to win America back, it won't be any better than Jim's call for de-funding universities that do not respect conservative ideology. Hell, I don't respect conservative ideology, so DE-FUND THIS!

Conservatives love to blame liberals for what's happening. It's all very convenient. I blame both – and maybe I blame conservatives more – maybe a lot more. If you don't get the point, just ask a conservative to put something on the line, and you'll see how busy he is for the next few years. 

Let me put it this way – conservatives are an army of Timothys.


Edit: No sooner had I posted the above than I read a column by Neal Boortz who had this to say…

OK .. I'm going to make some people mad with this one, but would you folks please put this asinine "tea party" idea to rest? … you think we're going to turn this thing around by mailing tea bags… "Hey, we're in a jam, but I DID something! I mailed a tea bag to my congressman! When the history of the 21st century is told I'm going to be right there because I mailed a tea bag!"

Over two hundred years ago young patriots dragged their naked feet down icy roads – leaving a trail of blood – to fight for independence. And you're sending tea bags. Put a tea bag in the mail and your job is done. 

Unfortunately, Boortz is not much good at recommending any solutions – he wants you to go register some voters. He forgot that those young patriots weren't interested in registering anything but KIAs. 


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About tedwest

A longtime veteran of comedy and political forums, I decided that I needed a more restful venue because... well... I finally hate everybody. Except my wife that is... and my ex-wife.. and... no, that's about it. I lead about as simple a life as one can, preferring activities that include anything that doesn't involve going out and seeing YOU! And I particularly enjoy what I call "Get the Bitch" movies on Lifetime. You know the ones where the intended victim finally does something so incredibly stupid that she forfeits her right to live, and from that moment on you're rooting for the stalker. Of course, it rarely works out the way you want, but when it does, the feeling you get is... well, there's nothing else like it, other than, maybe, eating chocolate chip cookies. Oh, and I'm proudly anti-wildlife, both foreign and domestic, and anti-environment - especially foreign environments. I think Howard Stern put it best when he said, "If fifty percent of the population died tomorrow, I can live with that." And I feel the same about the other fifty percent, so together, we've pretty much got it all covered.
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14 Responses to Conservatives Are Sharks, But Don’t Worry

  1. Jordan says:

    Ted, are you suggesting we buy guns? I think I get your point and agree people have to take a stance and look at the consequences right in the eye.How do we get Washington to listen? I am so fed-up at how many republicans are constantly going over to dems to sign bills that should have never been written to begin with.Or how republicans are timid in telling the truth about Obama. It's a mess. No argument there, but how do we get out of the rut we are in?

  2. TedWest says:

    First off, let me say that I've been in a really bad mood all week – not feeling well, arguing behind the scenes with BloggersBase, and never hearing or seeing Republicans/conservatives do anything meaningful.
    Today, I British representative to the EU ripped Gordon Brown. I mean he told him directly and in no uncertain terms what he thought of him and his policies. You have never heard a Republican do that to a Democrat. They do it to Republicans all the time, but the right is so amazingly weak that I won't commit to anything because I know – KNOW, that when the chips are down the rest of the right will turn into little Timothys. That's right, not even full sized Timothys.
    And about Bloggersbase, their scoring system is rotten. In the past twenty four hours, I've posted three post, answered six comments, had new scores come off pending, and my score hasn't moved a tenth. So I wrote them wondering if their scoring system was even working. I was assured it was, but………….
    They won't tell people how it works, because then "they'd abuse it." You just have to accept what they say your score is and take it on faith that it's accurate – whatever accurate even means to them. So I thanked them for the reply and told them that it inspired no confidence.
    What set me off this time was the guy in second who took a hit and apparently blamed it on me. The BB system itself makes hits possible by giving people ten votes per post. I mean if I could only give you a thumbs up or down, there's no way I could do serious damage to you with my lone vote.
    And I hate the encouragement of quantity over quality. You should be able to post as much as you like, but only your top vote-getter should count each week.
    I gotta lay down.
    Please tell a conservative to go to hell for me while I'm away.

  3. Jordan says:

    I want you to know that I feel your pain and I didn't respond sooner because I got no notif from Vox of your respond. I happened to checkin. Don't ask me why.Concur with the scoring debacle at BB and pretty much everything else.I took notice of the British UK member who ripped into PM Brown. So refreshing! I sure wish the Republican party would get an infusion of people like Mr. Hannan (?).Someone who doesn't mince words and will eloquently point out the peril of letting government run amok. Very impressive.It has been a good change of pace to hear "Europeans" like Sarko and the Czech guy scold Obama's plans.Even the Euro leaders, get it! Obama et al, as I suspected and got confirmation yesterday – is not only hell-bent on exploiting the crisis, he wants banks/economy to fail so he can be seen as the purveyor of the fix.Recenlty, I started reading a book, "The Nazis: A Warning From History."Dumbfounding! The similarities between then and now, Furher and Obama are strikingly aghast.Obama's grandstanding speech in Berlin last summer, plus the crowd's reaction was reminiscent of another era, minus the fascist salute!Couldn't oblige your last request because they are all MIA.

  4. Darcy says:

    Hi Jordan,My husband has been reading "The Naked Communist" and has said pretty much the same thing. It is shocking that it is so similar.

  5. TedWest says:

    Hey, damnit, I said the same thing about a year ago, and I don't read anything!

  6. Jordan says:

    You might have been more familiar with the Nazi's m.o. than I was. I knew the history, but not in these details. Personally, we didn't have Obama to compare it to a year ago.

  7. TedWest says:

    Well, I didn't live through it! 😉 But I did see Cabaret a dozen times. And I was struck by how much the Obama campaign resembled the rise of the Nazis, how radical his ideas were, how inexperienced he was, and how Hitler had risen to power basically through democratic means while manipulating background events to achieve it… just like Bobo and his enablers.
    Even if he were to do good, he's still the most dangerous man we've ever elected and if he's what I think he is, he's deadly dangerous.

  8. Darcy says:

    My husband feels like the main targets will be guns, banks, and farms.

  9. Jordan says:

    Guys, I am not a conspiracy theory, but I just got a video from someone I trust that I'll post on my blog sometimes today, I hope. Please, keep your mind open.

  10. TedWest says:

    I won't be able to see your video, but this is no theory. This guy is rotten to the core, and he's already done things we may never recover from. His main worry is that calamity will happen too fast and he'll be held responsible before he can fully implement his plans.
    Last year when I was saying this is the rottenest man who ever ran, I got the feeling then that people were dismissing me because I was sort of making a game of it with a catchy little phrase, but it's true. Not that Carter and Clinton weren't rotten, but this is the first guy with a clear and open agenda, and circumstances that cause people to buy what he's selling.
    And conservatives have been facilitating the implementation by their meekness. That fellow who excoriated Prime Minister Brown has been on several Fox shows, and the difference between him and our limp-wristed little weasels is stark.

  11. Jordan says:

    Ted, what's the problem with watching the video?I had no doubts a year ago Obama was a bad guy and considering the easiness with which he soared into the W.H. should have concerned everybody, but people were too mesmerized by his charisma to think. The facility with how this administration is passing one bill after another, reversing laws, etc, is scary. Mr. Daniel Hannan is a guy with grits and a clear message. Would that our republicans learned from him.

  12. TedWest says:

    The problem is mine, if it can be considered a problem in that I don't have broadband and have no intention of getting it until it costs the same seven bucks a month I pay for dialup.
    Funny you should mention the mesmerizing charisma thing. I think it's similar to those who are taken with his brilliance, neither of which exists in reality, as I'm sure you can attest, and I was sickened just last night when O'Reilly again saw fit to note how intelligent Obama was.
    I agree about the ease with which things are passing, but let's never forget that Republicans and George Bush facilitate the facileness of it all. We've been sold out coming and going.
    And I see no evidence at all that Republicans have learned anything. J.C Watts was on something the other night, and I was struck by what a milquetoast he seems to have become. Every hour of every day there should be a Republican at some microphone ripping the hell out of Obama and the Democrats… but you can't point to one.

  13. TedWest says:

    No sooner had I posted the above comment than I read the following from James Taranto… part in bold type is my highlight
    Profiles in Courage At least one member of Congress has changed his mind on the bonus-confiscation bill, Politico reports:
    Wisconsin Rep. Paul Ryan, the top Republican on the budget committee, said Thursday he would have voted against the 90 percent tax increase if he had known that legal scholars would deem it unconstitutional.
    "Now, that I know–which I didn't at the time–that this is unconstitutional, I wouldn't have voted the same way," Ryan said during a taping of C-SPAN's "Newsmakers" on Thursday–the show is set to air on Sunday. POLITICO was one of the participants in the Ryan interview.
    Ryan blames confusion about the constitutionality of the plan on Democrats for rushing the bill through the House.
    "You rush this thing to the floor. Nobody had time to review it," Ryan said on the C-SPAN program, adding that lawmakers "got conflicting advice on it" before the vote.
    This is an odd claim. For one thing, Ryan does not "know" that the bill is unconstitutional. It hasn't even been enacted, much less tested in court, and legal scholars are far from unanimous as to whether it is unconstitutional or, if it is, why. For another, as shown in the roll call, whatever confusion Ryan might have experienced did not prevent 87 Republicans (and six Democrats) from voting against the legislation.
    Ryan has been touted as one of the GOP's most promising young leaders on Capitol Hill. And certainly it's to his credit that he regrets having joined last week's political mob scene–which is to say, it's better than not regretting it. But this is far from an impressive show of leadership.

  14. Jordan says:

    Ted, you have made your point the lackadaisical state of affairs among republicans. It makes me sick.They should grab the opportunity at clearing the air from all the smoke and fog pumped in by Obama and his gangsters to poison the economy.Maybe we could send a few repubs to England and borrow Mr Hannan for a while. Ambiguity is not what we need at this crucial time. I am glad you mentioned O/Reilly and J.Watts. They were both duplicitous on their assessment of Obama. J.W. is a regular contributor on CNN. I used to like the guy.Call me stubborn, but while I agree President Bush had in hand in somethings, he would have never sold the country out like this guy is doing.On another note. What's with these liberal changing all established terrorists: "Terrorists; War on Terror…"Freedom Tower in NYC is the latest hit by the pc crowd to lose its name. Apparently, 'Freedom' was grating someone the wrong way.

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