Lipstick On A Cute Pig

I'm reasonably sure you didn't miss it, but yesterday, Mickey Obama pulled an… well, she pulled an "Obama," and said that people should vote for someone because someone is cute.

The crowd laughed and roared it's approval.

Why whoever could Michelob have been referring to?

Well, she immediately clarified: she was referring to HERSELF, she said.

And the crowd roared some more.

Thus the one who has not been seen on the campaign trail for quite some time owing to an acute attack of Foot In Mouth disease vaulted back onto the scene with a comment that not only showed she's not been cured, but which was outrageously presumptuous.

She thinks she's cute?

Let's see, I believe I once referred to her as "uniquely repulsive." Is that similar?

Or is it irrelevant? I mean, can't a woman be both cute and repulsive?

Certainly a number of actresses are. But Mickey's no actress, which is why it was clear to everyone that she wasn't referring to herself, but to Sarah Palin, just as her Alfred E. Newman lookin' spouse wasn't referring to any McCain idea when he dredged up the "lipstick on a pig" comment.

But the bigger problem is that Michelob is not now, nor has she likely ever been… cute!

Mean lookin'', angry lookin', it's almost too bad she isn't fat. Then people could legitimately say they think she'd be cute if she lost fifty pounds.

Besides, wouldn't NOW be outraged if some guy referred to one of it's members as cute? So has Mickey started a new feminist trend –

"Hi, I'm Mickey, I'm cute! I figured I'd tell you that because if you told me, one of my sistas would punch your lights out!"

Which is consistent with  her husband's admonition also issued yesterday that people should "get in their faces."

Now I don't know about you, but women have tried that approach with me before, and I'm proud to say that when any chickie has gotten in my face in the past, I never thought, "Oh, she's cute, I'll wait till she stops to make my move."

All I could think about was getting her to stop by any means possible consistent with the number and friendliness (to me) of the witnesses.

Although it looks like Mama Obama could probably take me… and her husband too… at the same time!

On yet another front yesterday, Joe Biden (I didn't know he was still alive, did you?) said this:

"We want to take money and put it back in the pocket of middle-class people."

Now that might sound awful to you, but I'm one of those middle-class people, and I want Joe Biden to know that while I'm not voting for him, my pocket is always open.

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About tedwest

A longtime veteran of comedy and political forums, I decided that I needed a more restful venue because... well... I finally hate everybody. Except my wife that is... and my ex-wife.. and... no, that's about it. I lead about as simple a life as one can, preferring activities that include anything that doesn't involve going out and seeing YOU! And I particularly enjoy what I call "Get the Bitch" movies on Lifetime. You know the ones where the intended victim finally does something so incredibly stupid that she forfeits her right to live, and from that moment on you're rooting for the stalker. Of course, it rarely works out the way you want, but when it does, the feeling you get is... well, there's nothing else like it, other than, maybe, eating chocolate chip cookies. Oh, and I'm proudly anti-wildlife, both foreign and domestic, and anti-environment - especially foreign environments. I think Howard Stern put it best when he said, "If fifty percent of the population died tomorrow, I can live with that." And I feel the same about the other fifty percent, so together, we've pretty much got it all covered.
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4 Responses to Lipstick On A Cute Pig

  1. Jordan says:

    She was lying for 2 obvious reasons:1. She only rushed to add it was herself she was talking about after the crowd bursted into roaring laughter. They all understood, as I did, who she was referring to.2. Michelle Obama is not running for Prez or VP, so no one is gonna vote for her.Nice try, Michelle…but you are not even cute. That would be reason # 3.

  2. Jordan says:

    Re: Joe Biden. He also had the gall to say that rich people should pay more taxes to show their patriotism! What?!Why doesnt he lead by example? He is even so stingy with his own money that in 9 yrs and many, many millions later, his contributions to charity totaled 3 grands!Certain middle class people I know, give away more than that in a year!

  3. Darcy says:

    That patriotism comment floored me too. It's income redistribution plain and simple.

  4. JudgeBob says:

    "Fair share?" Its not FAIR to anybody!!! Its stealing from the producers and giving to the addicts, alcoholics, shiftless, and lazy. If they weren't these when they started getting their "fair share" it is when they got used to getting it. Worst of all, very little of it actually makes its way into the hands of those who actually do need it.

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