Here we went again, folks. Snowy, our resident King of the Liberal Loons dropped in yesterday to apologize for making a fool of himself. Naturally, I graciously accepted his admission as is my nature. But the main problem with being the least bit civil to a liberal is that he interprets it as being a sign that you regard him as a fellow human.
Of course, nothing could be further from the truth, but mistaking civility for something more, he then believes he's welcome, and worse, that I might want his input.
So let me be as clear as I can. There is nothing that any liberal has to offer on anything political or anything that could be made political, or anything that contains any of the letters found in "political."
OK, so Snowy apologized for providing me great entertainment for two days by him falling victim to a hoax by one of his own (which explains why they don't need conservatives to make them look stupid) he then swears that I won't have him to kick around anymore – thus providing me with one moment more of entertainment before (I thought) he was leaving.
However, apparently thinking we'd made a love connection, Snowy decided to hang around a while, thus tempting fate, and sure enough, the old axiom held true: All Liberals are Idiots most of the time, and some liberals are idiots all of the time.
From my knowledge of Snowy, he falls somewhere in between – like he's probably not that stupid when he's sleeping.
Anyway, Snowy suffers from Palin Derangement Syndrome, and that's like stupid with a cherry on top, as our recent hoaxer gave testament to, and it's why Snowy felt the need to apologize to me in the first place. From Obama on down, Sarah Palin causes insane men to be insane², and that's almost never a good thing.
So a mere half day after Snowy said I'd never be amused by another faux pas of his creation, there he was pushing the amply discredited lie that our Sarah said that Iraq was a task from God. Which, if nothing else, proves he doesn't even listen to his own media… although who could be blamed for that?
Then, when it's brought to his attention that if he were American, he'd be the living symbol of the Democrat Party, he gets all huffy and starts braying and pulls a Margaret Dumont… "Well I NEVER…!"
To which Groucho responded, "Well… it's early yet."
This makes at least the third time Snowy has left here vowing never to return, which demonstrates another liberal axiom – Their word is as good as their reasoning.
Now I like Snowy when he's not talking politics. I'm certain he's a decent missing link. But I mean, as soon as I saw him here, I thought, what did I do to deserve this now? I know it would please Snowy if he could find some common ground with me, but that could only happen if somehow we came to share a grave.
The worst part is that I used to relish these encounters. I used to thrive on conflict. I used to enjoy trying to get liberals to focus think logically for the first time in their lives, and then watching them twist in agony as the marched deeper and deeper into unfamiliar territory. But no more.
It's always the same, only the accents change. From Mensa Boy to mouth-breathing nuts like the prankster whose endeavor only snagged Snowy, I've seen them all, and dozens of times, the poor reasoning, the litanies, the bad grammar, and their belief that they're smarter than you even though nothing in their entire academic record would encourage them to think something so preposterous.
And I really think Mensa should require a best two out of three IQ tests before they admit somebody, because after that last guy here, I'm certain he just got lucky on the multiple choice.
So to Snowy, I won't say goodbye, I'll say, "Happy trails…" because not only will we meet again, but you'll always be trailing.
TED NEWS ALERT: Even before I could post this, Snowy was back. I'm like Listerine!