The Duel Of The Dirtbags

Duel Of The Dirtbags

Teddy Kennedy is in it NOW. He went and upset the ladies, if you can call members of NOW that in good conscience.

Kennedy's supposedly upset that Bill Clinton has abused Barack Obama. The last time Kennedy was this upset was when he became furious about the treatment Mary Jo Kopechne received - from Davy Jones.

It's reported that Clinton talked to Kennedy by phone to remind him who the true black man was in the eyes of some prominent members of the black community. Kennedy, a long time member of the white community, would apparently have none of it, and plans to campaign for Obama across the fruited plain.

Sweet Caroline Kennedy is also endorsing Obama saying that she's very impressed that he's like her father in every way except color and experience.

By the way, I added the "sweet" because Neil Diamond said recently that his song was written about Caroline Kennedy. Hmmm… like this, maybe?

And when I hurt,
Hurtin' runs off my shoulders
How can I hurt when I'm with you
Warm, touchin' warm
Reachin' out, touchin' me touchin' you
Sweet Caroline
Good times never seemed so good
I've been inclined,
To believe they never would
Oh, no, no

NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, say it ain't so, Neil!?!

Meanwhile, Hillary is reportedly furious that her husband's finely honed "Black Like Me" tactics aren't working as well for her campaign as they did for his. She's and is considering putting him on the 15 day disabled list, and then sending him down to the minors for rehabilitation, the minors in this case being Antarctica where he'll talk to the penguins until they're convinced he's black like them.

Obama, for his part, is said to be delighted at the Kennedys' support and has reminded people that he, himself, is part Irish and could very well be a distant relative of Ted's.

So now it's Barack and Caroline, Ted and Oprah… all in bed together. Sorry Michelle, if only you'd been named Alicia it would be another perfectly bad remake of a '60s movie.

"What the world needs now… is love, sweet love…"

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About tedwest

A longtime veteran of comedy and political forums, I decided that I needed a more restful venue because... well... I finally hate everybody. Except my wife that is... and my ex-wife.. and... no, that's about it. I lead about as simple a life as one can, preferring activities that include anything that doesn't involve going out and seeing YOU! And I particularly enjoy what I call "Get the Bitch" movies on Lifetime. You know the ones where the intended victim finally does something so incredibly stupid that she forfeits her right to live, and from that moment on you're rooting for the stalker. Of course, it rarely works out the way you want, but when it does, the feeling you get is... well, there's nothing else like it, other than, maybe, eating chocolate chip cookies. Oh, and I'm proudly anti-wildlife, both foreign and domestic, and anti-environment - especially foreign environments. I think Howard Stern put it best when he said, "If fifty percent of the population died tomorrow, I can live with that." And I feel the same about the other fifty percent, so together, we've pretty much got it all covered.
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2 Responses to The Duel Of The Dirtbags

  1. Jack Yan says:

    ‘The last time Kennedy was this upset was when he became furious about the treatment Mary Jo Kopechne received’. I like your style.

  2. Jack: The campaign is starting to make me laugh!
    Ted: Wish I had penned the Davy Jones line. 😉

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