Could I BE any more proud?

Will she be the first one-name teenager?


Say it soft and it's almost like saying it louder.


Randy said it last night, but I said it a lot earlier only nobody could hear me – she's the best singin' seventeen-year-old ever! Amazing poise, great range… and an Amazon-in-training. What more could you want?

By the way, does anyone know if she won?

I'm kidding. The program's only half over here, but rumor has it Jordin's Teen Queen. OK, OK, it's more than a rumor, I looked it up, but I mean I knew she'd win after I heard Blake ask last night, "They want me to sing THAT?"

So Jordin gets this year's generic chart topper, and she deserves it, because she's gonna be around the rest of your lives – unless she does a Brittany Spears, and forty years from now they'll be complaining about her ticket prices.

Ms. Sparks has already been a front page news constant for a week, and tonight should assure she's a permanent fixture above the fold in the Arizona Republic for yeas to come. And I'm not kidding. If you don't believe me, you don't know Phoenix – the biggest hick town in the world. They'll probably rename Squaw Peak again. It was renamed once for the first woman killed in Iraq, but that's nothing compared being American Idol.

Now that's not to take anything away from Jordin. Phoenix has a right to be proud this time. The kid should really be bronzed.

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About tedwest

A longtime veteran of comedy and political forums, I decided that I needed a more restful venue because... well... I finally hate everybody. Except my wife that is... and my ex-wife.. and... no, that's about it. I lead about as simple a life as one can, preferring activities that include anything that doesn't involve going out and seeing YOU! And I particularly enjoy what I call "Get the Bitch" movies on Lifetime. You know the ones where the intended victim finally does something so incredibly stupid that she forfeits her right to live, and from that moment on you're rooting for the stalker. Of course, it rarely works out the way you want, but when it does, the feeling you get is... well, there's nothing else like it, other than, maybe, eating chocolate chip cookies. Oh, and I'm proudly anti-wildlife, both foreign and domestic, and anti-environment - especially foreign environments. I think Howard Stern put it best when he said, "If fifty percent of the population died tomorrow, I can live with that." And I feel the same about the other fifty percent, so together, we've pretty much got it all covered.
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2 Responses to Idolized!

  1. Think she'll be as successful as Carrie Underwood?

  2. TedWest says:

    I think she has the potential to become a huge star. But I say that as one who despises those sorts of people. I would much rather watch a movie full of no-name actors, and I firmly believe there should be a three picture lifetime limit.
    But my rule wouldn't apply to singers, but it sorta would. I mean, the Polling Stones should be euthanized, or at least enjoined from ever coming within a hundred feet of anything that can make sounds.
    But now I was very surprised at Carrie Underwood. She really is the best face Idol has produced. I hadn't been paying attention, and while I knew she was successful, she seems to really have it together.
    But she's limited. Jordin could blossom in many directions – or balloon, as the case may be. But Jordin clearly has the most potential and plenty of time to get there.
    The funniest moment in the finale? Blake trying to lift Jordin to express his joy for her.
    Btw, I was going to say this to Maddy and forgot – I felt a little sorry for Blake. While I detest the crap he thinks is music, he was the most steamrolled runner-up to date. Not only did he have zero chance, if by some miracle he'd won, he'd have become the most reviled Idol through no fault of his own.
    But he was gracious and gentlemanly, and so I ended up liking him, while wishing he'd go away quickly.
    And one more thing. What was with that coin toss to determine who sings first? There again, Blake was unlucky enough to win. And if he decided to take the better second slot, he'd have looked awful – like taking candy from a baby. They really should just draw straws.

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